Why are women following a successful man and not following an unsuccessful man?

Success is often seen as a desirable trait in a potential partner, especially for women who are looking for a long-term relationship. But what does success mean, and why are some women more attracted to successful men than unsuccessful men? In this blog post, we will explore some of the possible reasons behind this phenomenon, and how it affects both men and women in the dating scene.

Success and attraction

Success can be defined in different ways, such as having a high income, a prestigious career, a good education, a large social network, or a positive impact on the world. However, not all forms of success are equally valued by women, and some may even have negative consequences for their romantic prospects.

According to one study, when one's partner achieves success, it can make us feel inadequate. This sense of inadequacy is heightened in men because they are raised to be competitive and their sense of self is deeply tied to their professional success. Therefore, some men may feel threatened or intimidated by successful women, and may avoid dating them or sabotage the relationship.

On the other hand, some women may feel more secure and confident when they date a successful man, as they perceive him as a provider, a protector, and a leader. They may also enjoy the social status and the lifestyle that comes with dating a successful man. However, this does not mean that women are only interested in money or fame. In fact, women are more likely to value success as a proxy for other qualities, such as intelligence, ambition, passion, and creativity.

Success and culture

Another factor that influences women's preferences for successful men is culture. Culture shapes our values, beliefs, and expectations about gender roles and relationships. In many cultures, women are expected to be responsible for things that men are not. And, there are more pressures put on girls and women to look and behave in certain ways².

For example, in some Asian, Indian, Hispanic and Latino cultures, women are expected to take care of the males in the family, regardless of their age or birth order. They are also expected to prioritize their family over their career, and to defer to their husband's decisions. In such cultures, women may seek successful men as a way of fulfilling their cultural obligations, or as a way of escaping their restrictive roles.

However, culture can also empower women to pursue their own success and happiness. In some Western cultures, women are encouraged to be independent, assertive, and ambitious. They are also given more opportunities and resources to achieve their goals and dreams. In such cultures, women may not need or want a successful man to validate their worth or identity. They may also have more options and criteria to choose their partner, beyond success.

Success and compatibility

Ultimately, success is not the only factor that determines attraction and compatibility. There are many other factors, such as personality, values, interests, goals, communication, and chemistry, that play a role in forming and maintaining a healthy and satisfying relationship. Success can be a bonus, but it can also be a burden, depending on how it is perceived and managed by both partners.

Therefore, women who are following a successful man should ask themselves why they are doing so, and what they are looking for in a relationship. They should also be aware of the potential challenges and trade-offs that come with dating a successful man, such as lack of time, attention, intimacy, or equality. They should also be respectful and supportive of their partner's success, without losing their own identity or autonomy.

Similarly, women who are not following an unsuccessful man should not judge or dismiss him based on his lack of success. They should also recognize that success is not static, but dynamic, and that people can change and grow over time. They should also look beyond success, and appreciate the other qualities and contributions that their partner has to offer.

In conclusion, success is a complex and subjective concept that can affect women's dating preferences and behaviors. However, success is not the only or the most important factor that matters in a relationship. Women should follow their own definition of success, and find a partner who shares their vision and values, and who makes them happy.